How to Identify Fake Friends and Deal with Them Effectively: A Guide to Social Intelligence
Do you have a real friend? If you have a stabbing, think about it? You don't. It is the reality.
Do you have a real friend? If you have a stabbing, think about it? You don't. It is the reality. Most people don't have real friends; they think they do, but it's not friendship. Just because they're standing by your side doesn't mean they're actually on it. We will go over three signs that you don't have real friends.
1. No Principles
Most people pick their friends based on nothing. Someone you play video games with isn't your friend. So when you go to parties with someone who isn't your friend. Even someone you have known for a long time doesn't necessarily have to be a real friend. This is the mistake everyone makes. It seems you are friends, but they are not your friends. You are all friends with the same drug. You can be anything.
Whether it's smoking weed together, gossiping about people, or playing video games doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if it's a good habit like working out together. Would you still be friends if you wanted to stop engaging in the activity or practices that made you friends? Here is the truth.
At any other time, men knew that choosing bad friends would get them killed. They couldn't afford to carelessly pick random friends. You had to share a code of honor and principles. Nowadays, people will look at you as crazy when you say this. Listen, people no longer pick friends on values and principles, so they get burned. And rightfully so; if you only like your friends based on some habits you share, you deserve to face the consequences. No matter what they do to you.
It is your own fault. Even if they betray you in the worst way possible, it is still your own fault. You can't call someone a snake if you never checked your values and principles aligned with each other. There is no snake in this situation, only a fool. In reality, it doesn't matter if your friend is a different person in every sense of the word as long as you share the same core principles. Let me ask you a question, do you have each other's back in any situation, and would you fight to the last breath for each other?
Cowardice is unacceptable. If your friend is a coward, you should know he will leave you in a pool of blood. When you are already in danger, he will rat you out. Yes! It's all fun and games when you and your fake friends having fun, but it's not funny anymore when you lay there dying as they have left you behind.
At the same time, you should also be willing to go to the very end for your friend. Everyone will claim to be loyal to words, but talk is cheap. They already expose it to not be the case with the small stuff. You must pay attention. Are you brutally honest with each other? Even if the truth hurts. At the same time, do you never tear each other down in front of other people? How do you guys go about girls? Would you be loyal to each other? No matter how much money is that stake.
These are all questions you and your friend should have the same answers to if your friendship's foundation is only based on having fun together or doing an activity together. There is no foundation for that friendship. It is the lowest level of the company. Remember that.
2. Exchange of Value
Most people don't like to hear this, but every relationship is an exchange of value. Often the more weight being exchanged in a friendship, the better the company. If you deny this fact, the chances of your friendships being fake and worthless are very high. Let's take the example of two friends that share the same principles.
We'll call them Tony and James. Tony is an excellent listener and a very wise guy. Let's say he is funny too. And he is good with the ladies. James is very fit and business oriented. He is a go-getter. There is a value exchange going on in that relationship. James goes to tony to speak with him about life, his problems, or when he just wants to have fun.
Tony becomes stronger both physically and business-wise because of James. They offer each other multiple different forms of value. And that makes their friendship stronger. The value being exchanged does not have to be the same. Now, the value you offer each other can also be more similar. Because James has another friend that is just like him. They can push each other to become stronger and make more money together. Iron sharpens iron. After all, whether different forms of value or similar values are being exchanged. It doesn't matter; what matter is that there is a mutual exchange of deal going on, and the more value being traded, the better.
3. Fake Friends
This is rare. But some friends really are snakes. As said before, in most cases, people haven't considered the principals, which is their fault. But occasionally, a person can pretend to share similar values and principles.
They even exchange real deal with you but at their core. They are no more than a slimy snake that wants your trust. You could see them as an undercover cop. Within undercover cop needs to do is blend in them. They must gain the person's trust before shutting down their operation. It is the same with some people in life. This is why friends and family can sometimes hurt us the most. Because some of them never had good intentions, to begin with. Understand it. I'm not saying that people can never trust you or that all your friends will do you wrong.
There are genuinely great people out there that deserve your trust and loyalty. But always be aware and make sure you are a good friend yourself. You might have a period in your life. Will you have to go through life alone? That will always be better than having fake friends. Just make sure you know that eventually, good people will enter your life; when that happens, you would be a fool to not let them in. Even with bad experiences with fake friends, iron will always sharpen iron. Remember that.
These people know they can't come to you with hate and negativity; instead, they come to you with favors and good deeds. Listen, sometimes good deeds can hide an evil heart. Just because their deeds are good does not mean their heart is good.Once they have one over your trust, these people know your guard is down. And their intentions are not being watched.